Monday, September 03, 2007

Fopas

Well, it had to happen, and here it is. It's exactly 3:00am as I sit down to write this. I'm not feeling the urge to sleep yet. Let me clarify a few things before I launch into this post:

1. I've taken some heat because I was more worried about the UGA football game than I was about Sanjay going AWOL (Georgia won 35-14, by the way). I'm sorry if anyone was offended.
2. Sanjay is still missing. He still isn't answering calls. The police are investigating.

Now, the title of this post comes from a very interesting AIM conversation I had with Robert from Skewed View, probably a year ago. He tried to say faux pas, but inadvertently typed fopas. We've all made typographical mistakes, so no harm done, but fopas has become a running joke.

Anywho, the fopas in question here comes from the lovely world of Facebook, brought to you live on teh interwebs.

Facebook allows a user to reveal their religious beliefs, a action that proves deadly in many countries, but here in the good ole U. S. of A. we can't get enough of running each others god into the ground. The trick to thise issue is understanding that most people who have any sort of religious conviction are usually svelte in what they post. Unless you are a Miss America pageant contestant, or a, how should I put this, "Lady/Man of the Evening," we probably won't be getting the good juicy photos of you running around topless at a church bake sale, or soliciting the Royal English guardsman while making sure the paparazzi see as much of you thong as possible.

And yet people who say they are Christian throw up pictures of themselves in the clubs, bumping and grinding with any stranger who happens to be holding a Jack and Coke, or they are out on the lake in their bikinis with every guy they know hanging off of them while the bikini material is stretched to the breaking point trying to turn a B-cup into a D-cup (congrats if you can pull it off), or the pictures will show guys standing around holding those coozie-things used to keep a canned beverage cold, all while the Miller labels is clearly visible. My favorite is the increasingly popular selection for religion: "I LOVE JESUS!" You look at their profiles and their activities actually include drinking. Then you check their pictures and you get the standard shot of them actually tipping the keg itself over and you're left thinking, "How could a 95 pound girl in stiletto heels lift a keg?"

Also these "fopas"-masters will say that they are politically "Very Conservative" and yet you open their profile and every picture they've posted has them drinking (I'm talking serious mixing Bacardi with Grey Goose and a Jaegermeister chaser drinking), or pushing a half-empty Budweiser bottle into the lower recessed of their cleavage, or groping someone of the same gender.

I'm just thinking that if you're going to claim to be Christian, or Very Conservative, maybe you should act like it. Then again, it's now 3:24 am and my brain might not be firing on all cylinders.

1 comment:

Carl said...

Hey, there is NOTHING wrong with groping the same gender, regardless of your political or religious orientation. Unless you're a dude. Then you had better be making some SERIOUS cash off of it. So you just shut your damn mouth.