Football Future-see 4, etc.

The Right Wing prediction staff (I’ll admit, it’s just me, Blake, at this point… Sanjay is still missing, but for the sake of pleasantries, I’ll stay pluralized) kept up our winning ways last week, going 4-1 and making us a nice 11-4 on the year. This week we tackle conference match-ups, 3 SEC games, 1 Big East game, and 1 ACC game.

(13) Clemson at Georgia Tech: Tech is reeling and Clemson is rolling. The Yellow Jackets have dropped two straight since their precious Ramblin’ Wreck was, ironically, wrecked. Clemson is too much for the Jackets to handle, and Taylor Bennett, the GT QB, is having timing issues. Clemson wins, 26-13.

(5) West Virgina at (18) South Florida: South Florida made us look like geniuses by picking them over Auburn, but WVU is a tougher test. The Slaton/White ticket makes even the best defenses look silly. South Florida beat the Mountaineers last season, so West Virginia is revenge-minded, but that can be bad. It’ll be close; WVU gets their revenge, winning 31-28.

Ole Miss at (15) Georgia: Again, the Dawgs made us look good last week. Now the Rebels come to town after a close loss to mighty Florida. UGA sophomore QB Matthew Stafford is getting better and better as the season goes, and he now has a weapon that all the big-time quarterbacks have, poise under pressure. Georgia avoids the letdown and get’s their fourth win of the year, beating Ole Miss 31-13.

Auburn at (4) Florida: Florida won, keeping our record respectable, but they didn’t come close to the point spread we predicted. Auburn made us look good a few weeks back by falling flat against South Florida, and this is an SEC game, so you never know what to expect. Truthfully, Auburn doesn’t have enough for Florida this year. Tebow is a good QB, but all the running he does will get him into trouble. Someone is going to hit him hard, and it will do some damage. Florida wins, but they don’t roll, 30-23.

Mississippi State at (16) South Carolina: I’ll say it right now; the Gamecocks are officially on upset alert. Mississippi State has taken down Auburn, and beating Spurrier and South Carolina would let people know they’re for real. That’s the trick with the SEC, rivalry games happen every week and something bad tends to happen to teams with high rankings. I point back to UGA/Auburn last year. Auburn was number 5 in the nation. The Dawgs beat the Tigers 37-15. This game won’t be a blowout, but MissSt is playing well enough to win. Sly Crrom gets another big SEC “W”, 27-17.

Video games revisited



Today we travel back in time to Christmas of 1996. I was fourteen, and Christmas still held magic for me. Often it seems kids are disillusioned at an early age. Christmas loses whatever power it had, and kids look at it as just another day. I still hold out for the magic of a family Christmas. So it was that Christmas ’96 arrived…

I stumbled into the room, half asleep and half excited. Christmas is my favorite holiday, and not even because of the presents. I love the season. But, at age fourteen, presents are fairly important.

I sat down and began anxiously ripping into packages. First out was the N64 itself, resplendent in its vibrant multi-color box. I sat for a few minutes turning the box from one side to the other, reading every single word on it. The back of the box was peppered with screenshots of the different games that were coming out.

After scanning every panel on the box, I moved to the next present. What good is a game system without games? Not much, but present number two solved the momentary dilemma. Inside the box was a shirt. Now, first off, you can’t play a shirt. I’ve tried it, it can’t be done. Inside the shirt, though, was Star Wars: Shadows of the Empire. My first N64 game. I also opened Super Mario 64 that day, but Shadows stuck with me.

For those of you not in the know, Shadows of the Empire is quite possibly the most unbalanced game ever made. Some levels are easy and can be completed in a few minutes. Other levels can take upwards of an hour-plus to defeat. The bosses also range from the comical to the insanely difficult. To better understand the game, it helps to have read the book by Steve Perry.

A quick synopsis: Shadows of the Empire takes place between The Empire Strikes Back and Return of the Jedi. The story follows Luke Skywalker and company in tracking down the carbonite-frozen Han Solo, the adventures of rakish pilot Dash Rendar, and the competition between the evil crime lord Prince Xizor and Darth Vader.

The game follows Dash Rendar in a loose parallel of the events detailed in the book. In the book Rendar make reference to being on Hoth and fighting in the battle against the Empire. The game begins with that battle, and then follows Rendar in his quest through the Hoth base to get to his ship, the Outrider. After successfully overcoming these two missions, you fly through the Hoth asteroid belt.

From here the game gets harder. You travel to the junkyards of Ord Mantell and track down the bounty hunter IG-88. After dispatching IG-88, there is a fun level where you race swoops (essentially high-powered flying motorcycles) through Mos Eisley and Beggar’s Canyon.

You then track down the man himself, Boba Fett. Fett’s level is easily the longest and most trying in the entire game. After reaching Fett, you must fight him. You can kill him all you want, but he is never truly dead. He falls down into a hangar and reappears, this time in his ship, Slave I. You now have to defeat his ship. You’re still on foot.

If you’ve seen Return of the Jedi, then you’re probably familiar with the line “Many Bothans died to bring us this information.” in regards to the Death Star plans. In the game Dash Rendar leads the Bothan charge against an Imperial freighter carrying the plans. The freighter level is intense and is easily the most replayable level in the game.

The level where you have to trounce through the Imperial Sewers on Coruscant is horrifying. The sewers are dank, dark pits of despair. The boss battle in the sewers takes place under water, which is disgusting.

Once beyond the sewers, and after a nice, hot shower, you enter Xizor’s palace. The palace is one of the game’s most difficult levels. Save areas are few and far between, and the enemies are tougher to beat. The boss of Xizor’s palace is a Gladiator droid that you must kill three times. Round one is fighting the entire droid, who stands about fifty-feet-tall. Round two his legs fall off and you fight his flying torso. Round three his torso falls off and you fight a flying head.

Xizor’s Palace falls and you take to space for the final battle, Xizor’s skyhook. In a way, this battle is anticlimactic. You destroy the skyhook while dodging Imperial, Rebel, and Xizor-aligned starfighters. No matter how fast you fly after delivering the death blow, you will not escape.

In the book Dash Rendar is believed to die in the explosion of the skyhook. The game is no different, with the exception that after the battle, and after a few characters say “Oh my, Dash is dead!” you see Dash Rendar flying his ship through hyperspace.

In the end, Shadows has fantastic replay value, and if you learn the debug, you can play in ways you never imagined before.

Football Future-see III

Well, we dropped the ball last week, missing two games badly and ending up 3-2 for the week. Coupled with the 4-1 record from our first week, the Right Wing prediction staff is 7-3, with an extra game picked that never showed up on the blog (I correctly called Bama knocking off Arkansas).

So what’s in store this week: (1 Big Ten game, and then all SEC)

(10) Penn State at Michigan: Michigan finally got over the hump by crushing Notre Dame. Penn State still has to prove themselves to the doubters. PSU’s quarterback, Anthony Morelli, is dubbed as an on-again-off-again QB in need of consistency. The Wolverines offense has yet to be impressive, and yes I know they put up 38 on Notre Dame, but ND has the worst defense of all D-I schools in the nation. Look for Penn State to win, 27-21.

(12) South Carolina at (2) LSU: The Tigers are picked by 16 in this game, and that sounds about right. Spurrier’s birds played sloppy against and even-sloppier UGA team two weeks ago, and then played lowly South Carolina State last week. LSU is coming off impressive wins over VaTech and Middle Tennessee. Look of the Tigers to Geaux, winning easily, 37-17.

(3) Florida at Mississippi: Florida takes the SEC’s most potent offense to Ole Miss, where the Rebs have a defense ranked 104 out of 119. This does not look good if you’re a Mississippi fan. The Gators put up over 50 points against Tennessee, and UT’s Defense is better than Ole Miss. This is not a let down game. Gators roll 69-7.

(21) Kentucky at Arkansas: The Wildcats are coming off an emotional win against Louisville; the Razorbacks are coming off a bitter loss to Alabama. Kentucky wants to keep rolling; Arkansas wants to be back in the Top 25. Andre Woodson is trying to get his name in the Heisman hunt: Darren McFadden is looking to re-establish himself in the hunt. Kentucky, I think, wants it more. Wildcats top Razorbacks, 31-24.

(22) UGA at (16) Alabama: GameDay will be in Tuscaloosa for this one. On paper, this game looks fantastic. Georgia has the number 15 defense in the country, while Alabama has the number 25 offense. Nick Saban has revitalized the Crimson Tide. The Dawgs are suffering thorugh some media persecution for being too young, yet they only game they’ve lost was by 4 points, and they’ve outscored their opponents by a total of 46 points this season. ‘Bama’s big win over Arkansas provides momentum, but UGA is looking for a signature conference victory. It’ll be close, but UGA upsets the elephants 28-24.

Sampler Platter Episode II

Football Future-see

It's week three of the College season and already the Top 25 is shaking and moving. UGA faltered last week against South Carolina, Michigan is 0-2, Notre Dame hasn't shown up for a game yet, and Louisville doesn't have a defense. So here we go.

1. (21) Boston College vs. (15) Georgia Tech. It is very early in the season to be talking about conference titles, but this game could very well decide the ACC, or at least be a preview of the ACC title game. Tech has obliterated two opponents, out scoring the opposition 33-3 and 69-14. BC looks like they could hang with almost anyone in the nation. Still, expect Tech to win 34-20.

2. (1) USC vs. (14) Nebraska. I can't even begin to explain how badly I want Nebraska to win this game. I have never like USC, and it's mostly because of their coach. There's a big difference between winning a game and running up the score. Nebraska brings a better defense than USC has played in years, but it won't be enough, USC tops the Huskers 31-21.

3. Western Carolina vs. (23) UGA. I said I don't like running the score up, but sometimes it can be therapeutic. The Dawgs looked bad against the dark lord of the Sith, Darth Visor, but they get a I-AA opponent this week who they should beat (I'm looking at you Michigan). Look for Knowshon Moreno to tally about 200 yards in this one as Stafford and the Dawgs rebound, blowing out WCU 56-10.

4. (9) Louisville vs. Kentucky. This game showcases two of the best quarterbacks in the nation, Brian Brohm and Andre Woodson. Brohm is a Heisman candidate. Louisville, though, has shown no defense in two games. Kentucky comes out of the rough-and-tumble SEC East, and they're looking for the big win. Louisville has too much offense, though, and they will beat Kentucky, 41-35.

5. (22) Tennessee vs. (5) Florida. Big SEC match-ups are always fun. Tennessee will have to run the ball well to slow down the high-octane Gator offense. Tim Tebow is trying to establish himself as the premiere QB of the SEC, and he will be put to the test this week. Tennessee is still stinging from the Cal loss, and an upset of Florida would be the perfect salve. The tricky situation is the fact that this is a conference game, a time when SEC opponents bring their A-game. Look for Florida stop the run and win this one, 27-20.

Palpatine Syndrome...

Russian President Vladimir Putin dissolved the Russian government, dismissing the Prime Minister and Parliament. The belief in the world community is that Putin is paving the way for his hand-picked successor, defense Minister Sergei Ivanov, to be installed as Prime Minister, and then be elected President next spring.

I call this the Palpatine Syndrome because of the Star Wars movies. The Emperor, Palpatine, dissolves the senate and places control in the hands of governors who answer directly to him. Putin has taken steps toward acquiring absolute power in Russia, and everyone seems to be taking his move with a grain of salt.

Robert, here's your shot at a return of the Cold War.

Notes on Sanjay
He's still missing.

Football Future-see

I’ll try every week to correctly predict the outcomes to five games from the college schedule. I know I missed week one, but the truth is, I just decided to do this.

1. Notre Dame at (14)Penn State. ND is 0-1 after Georgia Tech ran into the welcoming arms of “touchdown” Jesus in South Bend, blowing out the Irish 33-3. Penn State tallied 59 points in their opener. Penn State has a quarterback, Notre Dame has three, which any good coach would tell you, mean Notre Dame doesn’t have a quarterback. This one should be fun, if only for the “whiteout.” Penn State rolls 42-13.

2. Oregon at Michigan. The upset of all time is still echoing in Ann Arbor, and the big house is full of the screams of indignant big blue fans. Oregon runs the same offense as Appalachian State, only with bigger guys. That means Michigan is in for another run-and-gun game. Oregon sends the Wolverines to an 0-2 start, handling Henne and Hart, 35-24 Ducks.

3. South Carolina at (11)Georgia. The Dawgs were supposed to lose their season opener to Oklahoma State. They were supposed to falter in week one, not Michigan. But, just like when Boise State came calling a few years back and every sports writer in the country put UGA on upset alert, the Dawgs hunkered down and laid a beating on the potential upseter. South Carolina, though, is in year three of the Spurrier Dictatorship, and they’ve yet to give UGA a challenge. This year doesn’t look any different. Dawgs win, 31-14.

4. (9)Virginia Tech at (2)LSU. VaTech is the feel-good story of ’07, but their football team left a lot to be desired against East Carolina, winning by a 17-7 score. LSU, on the other hand, blanked a fellow SEC team, beating Mississippi State 45-0. Unfortunately for the boys in maroon and orange, those Tigers in purple and yellow aren’t gonna hold back. LSU wins handily, 37-20.

5. South Florida at (17) Auburn. I hate to say it, but an SEC school is about to fall. South Florida is a dangerous team. They beat a couple of Big East / National powerhouses last season. Look for Auburn to sound the upset alarm. South Florida squeaks by, 30-27.

According to Whoopi

I honestly don’t know where to start on this one. Whoopi Goldberg, in her first fifteen minutes on the job as new co-host of “The View,” came out in defense of Michael Vick. All of which is well and good; if you want to defend Vick, feel free. But her defense of the disgraced Falcon’s quarterback was founded on the thought that dog fighting is an integral part of southern culture.

That’s right, according to Whoopi, dog fighting is as ingrained in southern culture as cock fighting is in Puerto Rico. Elisabeth Hasselbeck, another View co-host, congratulated the NFL on suspending Vick indefinitely. Goldberg’s response included commenting on Vick coming from a culture where no one questions [dog fighting]. I was unaware of that, but apparently southerners are so backward that we all consider dog fighting to be okay, and we see no immorality in it.

The sad thing is Whoopi’s mindset is not limited to Whoopi. There is a large percentage of the population that believes everyone in the south to be an ignorant, backwater redneck. We all think the Civil War is still going on and we’ve all saved our Confederate money for when we win.

Goldberg claimed that Virginia-native Michael Vick is from the “deep south” and that dog fighting is just part of his up-bringing. I’ll admit that rural dog-fighting has a history among southerners, and I’m not proud of that. But I’ll also say that not that many people consider Virginia to be the “deep south.”

I’m honestly stuck on this one. Was Goldberg’s comment meant only to stir up controversy, as Rosie was so good at doing? Or was it indicative of her belief that the south is a backward, inferior part of the nation?

Fopas

Well, it had to happen, and here it is. It's exactly 3:00am as I sit down to write this. I'm not feeling the urge to sleep yet. Let me clarify a few things before I launch into this post:

1. I've taken some heat because I was more worried about the UGA football game than I was about Sanjay going AWOL (Georgia won 35-14, by the way). I'm sorry if anyone was offended.
2. Sanjay is still missing. He still isn't answering calls. The police are investigating.

Now, the title of this post comes from a very interesting AIM conversation I had with Robert from Skewed View, probably a year ago. He tried to say faux pas, but inadvertently typed fopas. We've all made typographical mistakes, so no harm done, but fopas has become a running joke.

Anywho, the fopas in question here comes from the lovely world of Facebook, brought to you live on teh interwebs.

Facebook allows a user to reveal their religious beliefs, a action that proves deadly in many countries, but here in the good ole U. S. of A. we can't get enough of running each others god into the ground. The trick to thise issue is understanding that most people who have any sort of religious conviction are usually svelte in what they post. Unless you are a Miss America pageant contestant, or a, how should I put this, "Lady/Man of the Evening," we probably won't be getting the good juicy photos of you running around topless at a church bake sale, or soliciting the Royal English guardsman while making sure the paparazzi see as much of you thong as possible.

And yet people who say they are Christian throw up pictures of themselves in the clubs, bumping and grinding with any stranger who happens to be holding a Jack and Coke, or they are out on the lake in their bikinis with every guy they know hanging off of them while the bikini material is stretched to the breaking point trying to turn a B-cup into a D-cup (congrats if you can pull it off), or the pictures will show guys standing around holding those coozie-things used to keep a canned beverage cold, all while the Miller labels is clearly visible. My favorite is the increasingly popular selection for religion: "I LOVE JESUS!" You look at their profiles and their activities actually include drinking. Then you check their pictures and you get the standard shot of them actually tipping the keg itself over and you're left thinking, "How could a 95 pound girl in stiletto heels lift a keg?"

Also these "fopas"-masters will say that they are politically "Very Conservative" and yet you open their profile and every picture they've posted has them drinking (I'm talking serious mixing Bacardi with Grey Goose and a Jaegermeister chaser drinking), or pushing a half-empty Budweiser bottle into the lower recessed of their cleavage, or groping someone of the same gender.

I'm just thinking that if you're going to claim to be Christian, or Very Conservative, maybe you should act like it. Then again, it's now 3:24 am and my brain might not be firing on all cylinders.

80: Sanjay please come back.

I found a homeless cat last night. I brought him in, but he won't leave his cardboard box.

Sanjay still has not reported in. He still isn't answering his phone. I'm hoping he isn't lost.


These pictures could bring him back, he loves funny cats. And I really need a call screener. BigMommaHawaii42 won't leave me alone.

Anyway, since I'm going it alone now, I have some news. I uploaded Mozilla Firefox last night. My computer actually coughed. Like a 75-year-old asthmatic, my HP with Windows 98 physically hacked for a few minutes. But I'm safer now, from the evil internet.

Some of you may be thinking, haven't you been going alone for a while? I mean, Sanjay's only written twice in two months. Well, since I have an old HP with Windows 98, Sanjay has been fulfilling his purpose as tech support. Believe me, I need tech support.

Sorry, though, time's short. UGA kicks off in a few minutes and I've got to get ready. Have fun.